I shared with some of my close friends recently that my dear grandfather, A.G. Abide Jr. or “Grandy” to me, passed away last week at 81.

He was quite a character and someone who has forever impacted my life in many ways that I will never be able to express through words. He was born and raised in Greenwood, Mississippi and you’ve got to love a small town…they ran a story about him as a businessman on the front page of the paper the day after he passed.

My favorite quote of the article was from my “Uncle” Alex Malouf, one of my grandfather’s many nephews, “One of the best things A.G. ever did was marry Pat. It was a wonderful marriage for a long, long time,” Malouf said. If any of you have heard me talk/brag about my “Grammy,” a former American Airlines flight attendent in the 1950’s and probably my favorite person in the world, you know that I love this quote because I think she is the most fabulous!


The granddaughters dressed my beautiful grandmother for what would be an emotional day. I was surrounded by more priests in 36 hours than I’ve ever been in the 24 years of my life, as several priests who had at one time lived in Greenwood drove from out of town to see Grammy and offer their condolences. They all had Irish accents. It made me smile!

Seeing how much even the priests love my grandmother amazed me. At one point during the day she got teary and Father Bill leaned into her with a hand on her knee and said, “Pat, you were an amazing wife and you are a wonderful person.” I mean…for THE PRIEST to be telling you that you’re an amazing wife (of 57 years) and person?? Seriously?

I was amazed at how full the church was and how many people, even those in their 80s, drove from all over to come remember Grandy’s memory with us.  My grandparents home was completely full of loving friends, family and ridiculously delicious Southern food.  It’s amazing how people will come together in times of need.  When we returned from the cemetary, there were multiple coolers of drinks in the garage (plenty of Miller Lite, no lie…and this was mid-day on a Thursday! Love the Delta!) and the house was full of people and inviting.

Every table was full of food and women were busy working in the kitchen.  When I asked my mother (who is my grandparents only living child but is blessed to have 20+ cousins and loving family members) who all set up and did all of this while we were gone, and at first she wasn’t even sure!!  Times like this are such a great reminder of how I want to treat others because when so much love like that is poured out to you, it reminds you that you want to make others feel that loved too.

The day was perfect and I know that my grandfather was happily with his parents, sisters and son looking down on all of his family and friends celebrating his life on earth.  I think he’d be pleased.

And Grandy, if you’re reading this up there, know that Patrick and I tried to convince Mom to bury you with a handful of candy in one hand and and a handful of Lifesaver Spearmint mints in the other.  She wasn’t as into the idea as we were, but Grammy thought it was funny!

Some of us had changed clothes for the ride home.  Grandy’s obituary is still listed on the ClarionLedger.com and you can read it here.  Thanks so much for reading – XO –

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5 thoughts on “My Grandy

  1. It is so hard losing a grand parent or parent! But, it is so wonderful to see all of the love and support of people and even perfect strangers during such a difficult time! My prayers are with you and your family!


  2. Thank you ALL and thank you to so many of you who sent me sweet text messages and e mails. I love each and every one of you — y’all are the SWEETEST!

  3. Kathleen,
    Thank you so much for the wonderful pictures and precious words about your grandparents. As one of thier “older” nieces, the older pictures were wonderful to see. I was born on your Grandy’s 18th birthday. My Dad was out of town and he drove my mom, his sister, Marie, to the hospital and stayed until I was born. He loved to tell the story and I loved hearing it. Know that he loved you all very much.
    Mary Ann

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