Pregnancy and Baby #2 Q&A

I decided to split these up into two different Q&A’s so those that were looking for pregnancy chat can find this post and those who are not can check out the other one (to be posted next week!).

Many of you are also pregnant (congratulations!) and have requested more pregnancy/maternity content, but I’ve also heard from those trying to conceive or not in baby-land right now how much they appreciate not feeling like pregnancy chat is all we are about. While my main focus for this site and brand is adult fashion and home, I did link some pregnancy and maternity content from 2019 when I was pregnant with Hudson that some of you may be interested in checking out.

SO, this post is for those who choose to find it. Let’s dive right in with the most popular questions!

Are you going on a babymoon this time around?

We haven’t planned one. The last month my doctor wants me traveling would be this month and it’s so cold and gloomy outside. I also don’t feel great about travel at the moment with virus numbers, so I’d rather nest and plan a big, fabulous trip in late summer or early fall when the baby is on a better sleep schedule, I have energy and can enjoy a few cocktails.

In fact, we are planning something extra amazing for the two of us to celebrate both the new baby and our 10 year anniversary this fall. And I can’t wait to have something like that to look forward to!

Have you done a pregnancy skincare roundup?

I don’t and I intentally choose not to share many “pregnancy-safe” recommendations as everyone’s definition of safe can vary. My San Francisco and Georgia doctors even have differing opinions about skincare, so it really depends on what you are comfortable with.

I discuss any ingredients I’m unsure about with my OBGYN and read the labels on my skincare to make my own assessments. For a shortcut, I have found it really helpful to look up items on 15 Minute Beauty.

When are you due?

March! I am so looking forward to a spring baby. Christian’s birthday is in March as well, so they will hopefully be fellow Pisces.

Can you recommend a great pair of maternity leggings?

I love these and these.

I also have a few pairs from this brand and they are so comfortable.

Do you share the baby’s name with friends and family before birth? Trying to decide how to handle.

I don’t mind sharing the name with family and a handful of very close friends. But maybe it’s because we feel confident in our choice(s). With Hudson, we were back and forth between two names (the second name will be this child’s name if the baby is a boy), so I liked asking people I respected for their opinion so I could feel out their first impressions. I found it helpful, as a name is so often a first impression.

However, if you’re someone who is more sensitive or doesn’t want to be swayed, keeping it to yourself might be the most wise route.

What was that nursing/maternity bra that you liked?

This one – I have all three colors and followed the sizing chart. LOVE IT.

Which diaper bag do you plan to use?

I used this insert in a tote bag (Goyard, Louis Vuitton, whatever you’ve got) with Hudson when he was small.

Once he became toddler and was going to church nursery and such, I found a backpack like this one that fully seals was a better option.

I still use both and find both to be helpful.

Stroller link for toddler and an infant?

I don’t plan on getting a new stroller. We have four different strollers already – the Silvercross Jet for travel, the Doona for on-the-go, the Silvercross Comet Eclipse, and the Bugaboo Fox.

I also wasn’t sure if I needed a double stroller, and after doing my own research and asking other moms of multiple kids, I decided against it for now. I will buy a stroller ride board like this one or this one for Hudson for walks or weekend adventures. But at 2 and 2 months he already will only sit in the stroller for a short period before he tells me, “mama, I want to RUN!” or is begging me to get out.

So if we take a big trip that involves a lot of walking… I will likely just borrow a friend’s double stroller.

Do you plan to take maternity leave?

Yes! I will be taking a period of time off of contracted work. I plan to hop on the blog and social media organically when/if it feels right, but I am not going to be putting any pressure or expectations on myself. Then I plan to dip back into work part-time before coming back completely full-time in May.

I now know that I didn’t take enough time off with Hudson. But he was a difficult newborn experience and truthfully, some of that quiet time in my office was really good for me. It helped me to feel like ME. So if coming back to work earlier than May is out of a need or desire, I’m open to that too.

Just planning to listen to my gut and my instincts and am grateful for a flexible job that allows me to do so!

You’ve shared you didn’t enjoy breastfeeding the first time around. Do you plan to try again or no?

I did share my first breastfeeding journey in this post. I was able to nurse Hudson for 8 weeks. For anyone else in the same boat – we have only had one ear infection in 2 years, Hudson has never had the flu or covid and has managed to meet every milestone on time or ahead… so please do not beat yourself up about how you feed your baby!

To be transparent, I didn’t really want to share it because it felt really personal to me. But I was repeatedly asked about breastfeeding, which I didn’t see coming. I feel it’s an intimate experience that differs woman to woman. All babies are unique and experiences can even vary between your different children.

I do plan to try again and will be working to set myself up for success, whatever that even means! But I also plan to follow my instincts and will likely keep my experience to myself this time around. Being asked and feeling like I had to address it put me in a position I wasn’t comfortable with and wasn’t prepared for. Live and learn!

Do you have any postpartum blog posts? Or postpartum style ideas?

I’ve been asked this before and I went and looked and… I actually don’t. I think like anyone else, that “fourth trimester,” was spent taking care of myself and Hudson as well as I could. I also didn’t take much, if any, maternity leave and continued to work in various capacities, so time was limited all around.

Because I do plan to take more time off this time, postpartum fashion isn’t a topic I plan to focus on. I will likely be in loose, comfortable clothes from my closet until I feel good enough to put on pants with buttons. Although I did buy some larger sized denim last time around I’ll probably pull out. My hope is that by the time I come back full-time in May I’ll be ready to discuss fashion and style for all women!

My best advice is to try to put on a little bit of makeup each day, spend 5 minutes on your hair (even if it’s just a neat ponytail) and put on something that isn’t pajamas if you can. Even just drawstring pants and a cardigan. Anything that makes you not feel embarrassed to answer the door is a win! When I do that, I carry myself with more confidence and when I catch my reflection in the mirror I don’t feel sad or blue. That’s what it’s about – how YOU feel about yourself.

Did you get stretch marks during pregnancy? Any tips?

I didn’t get them with Hudson and am using a belly oil daily on my breasts and belly. I also just got this stretch mark cream in from Nemah and am trying it out.

I start using belly products as soon as I have a bump and continue through postpartum. I don’t have any other tips other than crossing my fingers, hoping my genetics does me some favors and saying a prayer!

What will you do the same or different with this baby?

I haven’t thought much about what I plan to do differently. I think children are unique and what works for one baby may not necessarily work with the other.

For example, Hudson was a fussy baby and very challenging during the day. But I think he exhausted himself being so unhappy during the daytime, so he slept like a champ. Sleep training was a breeze (we followed Moms on Call and Taking Cara Babies). He was in his crib that he sleeps in now by 8 weeks through the night.

BUT this child may a beast to sleep train – who knows! I plan on following my instincts and getting to know the new baby before making any big plans or assumptions on what they will be like or how it will go. I’ve learned to try to walk into new situations with little or no expectations and it makes it a lot easier not to get frustrated or feel as overwhelmed.

What did you buy for baby #2 that you didn’t already have? Or products you used with Hudson and plan to use again! Anything you’re changing for the next baby or that you didn’t love with Hudson?

I haven’t bought much, if anything, for this next baby. We were fortunate to have a lot for Hudson – bassinets, rockers, swings, clothes, bottles, bottle warmer, bouncer, toys, car seat, etc. I liked what I used with him.

I do have this little play gym/tent that was gifted to us by Lalo that I look forward to using. And we received this precious busy bee Dock-a-Tot as a gift.

I also know how quickly those first few months go by and you don’t need that much. You just don’t. Personally, I think it’s worse to have too much and feel like there is baby stuff everywhere. It can make me feel quickly overwhelmed.

How did you get in the mental place where you were ready for another baby?

I am in my 30’s and want our kids to be relatively close in age. So it was less about being ready and more about math and reality. I also want to leave space for a third baby which meant… the show had to get on the road.

This baby and Hudson will be 2 years and 4 months apart. I won’t lie, my lower back is in a lot of pain from the weight of a toddler while being pregnant. I don’t know if I’ll be able to do it again with this close of an age gap!

How do you manage living far from family? Struggling with this with a 2-year-old and currently pregnant.

It can be hard sometimes. A lot of my friends have parents within two hours, or even in town, and I just can’t relate to that.

But rather than focus on what I don’t have I try to focus on what I do have. And I make sure to have friends whose parents are also out of state. We get each other, and it’s nice to feel like you’re not the only ones who can’t drop off the kids on a whim and go have an easy adults-only vacation.

Also? Be proud of yourself. You’re doing a lot and you’re learning how to do it on your own. That’s impressive! I hope you are proud of yourself for seeing what you’re capable of – go girl!

When is Hudson moving to his big boy room?

When we think he’s ready or when we need his crib for the baby. The new baby will be in a bassinet for a while, and I’ve talked with our pediatrician about the transition for Hudson to his big boy bed and room. We will start with naps in the big boy bed and room and once those are going well, make the full transition. Hudson has shown us to handle transitions pretty well, so I feel good about it!

I would recommend consulting your pediatrician for their advice as every toddler is different and may be ready at different times.

Going home from hospital looks?

I will probably be in anything loose. We didn’t take any memorable photos or anything with Hudson on the day we went home. I just wanted to be comfortable and not have anything too tight considering what my body had just been through.

Comfort wins in the fourth trimester! ASOS has some really great options like this and this.

Can you share baby names? I’m due in March and haven’t found our name yet!

I don’t have a long list of names, unfortunately. I have one boy name and one girl name (both happen to be family names and were options when I was pregnant with Hudson) and not much extra on the list. In fact, we still have to finalize the boy middle name!

BUT a few names I love that we aren’t using:

Lola, Seraphina, Liv, Rosie, Philippa or Pippa

Hampton, Sawyer, Leo, Crew, Alexander (Hudson’s middle name)

How many kids do you want?

I’m not really sure. We are both from families of 5 (total), so I think we always assumed we would have three. But we are also open to having two if that’s what is meant for us. I think we would be happy with two children, but we both loved growing up with more than one sibling and want to give that to our kids. I think we’ll just have to see how we feel.

On my side, we are all 2 years apart and on Christian’s side, the kids are a little more spaced apart. He has said he wished they could have been closer in age, so we worked hard to ensure at least two of our littles would have that. More about trying to conceive here. This time around took twice as long as Hudson did, so they could have been less than two years apart. I think God knew what He was doing giving us a little more time. All is well that ends well!